WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUNG ADULTS?

What happened to young adults, and what led to the Generation Gap and the youth culture of rebellion and decadence that continues today? There was a time in America (and Europe) when a teenager was normally considered ready for normal adult work and responsibility, teenage marriage did not involve a high divorce rate, and juvenile crime was not considered normal behaviour. Up till a few decades ago a young lad could join the armed forces at fourteen (with parental consent of course), but this is no longer considered practical. In Bible times a person was considered a young adult at the age of thirteen, but today we have a person called an adolescent, someone who is not physically a child but is not considered a young adult. What happened? Let us look at some of the societal and cultural trends that led to this: 

For much of American history families and society in general were patriarchal, and adults had moral, religious, and social responsibilities to provide for, discipline, and train their children, and care for elderly parents, and parents normally raised up their children to succeed them, and not to merely succeed. Over time government expansion and the Industrial Revolution were allowed to interfere with family relationships and responsibilities. With the Industrial Revolution came Child Labor Laws, some of which made sense while others were absurd. For example, laws originally intended to keep a child whose age is still a single digit from working sixteen hours a day in a sweatshop or coal mine under unhealthy conditions are now used to keep healthy teenagers from doing light work for eight hours or less in air-conditioned buildings. The idea that children should not be taught to work and be responsible and teenagers cannot or should not be expected to handle work and responsibility became popular and accepted. Free public education became compulsory continued education, thus encouraging artificially extended childhood and further enabling indoctrination in secularism and humanism. If movements and legislation to coerce teenagers into staying in school were ultimately based on concern for the interests and welfare of youths, then intelligent and knowledgeable students would be encouraged to get a GED and seek employment or go on to college or vocational school; the real issue is government indoctrination and the expansion of government power. We even have children's courts, or juvenile courts, to impress upon young minds that they are not fully accountable or completely responsible for their behaviour. 

Secular humanism has been invading and dominating public schools, colleges, the media, politics, churches, and religious institutions for over a century.

Humanism replaced integrity, self-respect, and other gentlemanly (or genteel) and feminine characteristics with self-esteem, replaced personal responsibility and accountability with self-esteem and blamed all sorts of sins, personal problems, and social maladies on lack of self-esteem. Humanism has produced a generation where academics and work ethics often suffer because of replacing proficiency with self-confidence and civility and hospitality are often sacrificed on the altar of self.

Secularism replaced Bible principles with secular philosophy and denies the need to look to Scripture for direction in human interactions and relationships.

Women became masculine and men became effeminate or adopted a macho facade, these extremes being contrary to God's design for the male as the Lord's representative and the female as an helpmeet. Feminism encourages women to reject their complementary role and mimic the sexual attitudes, behaviour, and aggressiveness of men and thus relinquish their natural power; this merely fulfills male fantasies and accommodates the baser instincts of men while lowering the respect of men for women instead of encouraging women to be the civilising and stabilising influence on men that they are designed to be. The rise of feminism has been destructive to chivalry and femininity, and role reversals anathematized the need for a woman to be treated like a lady or a gentleman to be respected. The need for true gentlemen and ladies was replaced by “equality;” equals do not complement each other, they compete. God's design for communities, organizations, and the family is hierarchy with a balance between equality of being and functional subordination.

Materialism has produced a society of ungrateful, indulgent, and overbearing people without a sense of thankfulness and appreciation, a generation of selfish expectation where an attitude that we deserve everything prevails.

Widespread lack of parental presence, training, supervision, and participation in the lives of children has had negative effects.

Movies and TV shows often portray Middle School and High School students as small children in the bodies of youths and present this either as typical and expected of every teenager or as an example to emulate. Encouraging extended childhood and discouraging emotional and intellectual growth jeopardizes future relationships, makes people more easily persuaded to reject the influence and values of family and church, and makes people more easily indoctrinated in secularism, humanism, and statism. 

In the Twentieth Century, especially the latter half of the Twentieth Century, some misleading myths and theories were widely accepted even in Christian circles, such as: 

·        The theory of evolution is compatible with Christianity and Bible truth. 

·        Humans are naturally good. (Man can choose to do right, but sin comes naturally because humans are natural-born sinners. How many parents ever had to teach a child how to be bad?) 

·        Satan rules the Earth. (Satan rules in the hearts of unbelievers, "the wicked world system," but God is the present ruler of the Earth and nothing in the Bible ever indicates that God abdicated His throne and turned rulership over to Satan.) 

·        The Bible is only for Christians. (The Bible is God's message to all mankind and provides guidance on every area of human existence and applying Bible teachings benefits both believers and unbelievers. The important difference is that for the unbeliever the Word of God is convicting and for the believer the Word of God is cleansing.) 

·        Bible truths and standards only apply to the church-related part of our lives and do not apply to our secular lives. 

·         It is wrong for a Christian (especially a preacher) to hold a public office or otherwise try to influence society for righteousness. (Daniel 2:48-49; Matthew 5:13-16; Acts 17:6-7; II Corinthians 10:4-6; I Timothy 2:1-2; I John 5:4; etc.) Many insist that the Bible doctrine of separation means that Christians must be neutral concerning everything outside of church activities, but the separation taught in the Bible is godly distinctions, conduct, and relationships within society, not isolation from society or neutrality concerning politics and community affairs. (Romans 13:1-7; Ephesians 5:3-11; I Timothy 3:7; I Peter 2:11-12) For a long time it has been normal or even typical for Christians in America to blame the displacement of the Christian worldview, the erosion of traditional family values, and alarming increases in divorce, unwed pregnancy, venereal disease, youth rebellion, and other social maladies on everything but the decline in Christian influence and subsequent increase in rejection of the Bible and Christian values instead of recognising the responsibility of Christians to impact culture and community for righteousness. It became commonplace for Christians to overemphasize pet theories about Bible prophecies and promote a neutrality or isolation that rejects or prevents interaction between Christianity and culture and encourages believers to withdraw from society and be neutral because of preoccupation with speculations about things which they obviously do not and cannot know while ignoring the implications of the teachings and arguments being used to justify the apathy being promoted: The longer you keep a sinking ship afloat the more time there is left to rescue the perishing.

·        After WWII there arose a trend of giving teenagers a separate identity and segregating teenagers into a different class of people, and it has become commonplace for churches to segregate teenagers from mature influences, thus making it common for youths to be peer-dependent instead of elder-dependent and replacing respect for elders with respect for youth and immaturity. (Consider Proverbs 13:20; Isaiah 3:4-5; Malachi 4:6) A popular theory in Christian circles is that young people must be segregated from the rest of the church to reach them effectively. But what is the Bible precedent? “There was not a word of all that Moses commanded, which Joshua read not before all the congregation of Israel, with the women, and the little ones, and the strangers that were conversant among them.” (Joshua 8:35; also consider II Chronicles 20:13: Ezra 8:21: Nehemiah 12:43; Acts 21:5) There is a principle in Malachi 4:6 that prepares children and youths for a relationship with God. It should be noted that the Generation Gap is a modern phenomenon and teenagers were not given a separate identity or segregated into a different class of people until after World War II. Since children and teenagers are building an identity and naturally seeking that identity from those around them, we should be encouraging fellowship with mature influences. All humans young and old tend to seek an identity from those around them, to a greater or lesser extent depending on the individual, but inexperience tends to make one a bit more vulnerable. Older adults should be reminded to set an example and to mentor young people and youths should be reminded of the value of fellowship with those who are older and wiser than themselves (especially of their own gender) and taught to respect their elders in general. (Consider Proverbs 13:20; Titus 2:1-8; etc.) King Solomon raised up a fool who rejected the wise counsel of older men and heeded the foolishness of his young peers because he learned to respect his young peers and trust their insight through regular fellowship; contrast this with the example of Christ Who enjoyed the company of older men when He was young. (I Kings 12:8; Luke 2:44-46) Mature Christian men should be mentoring young men, which includes teenagers, and mature Christian women should be mentoring young women, which includes teenagers; with all the claims and arguments that women should be in male roles being heard in Christian circles it is ironic that the ministry specifically assigned to women is often the most neglected. (Titus 2:1-8)

·        In the 1940s some "experts" began teaching that it is wrong to use corporal punishment to discipline children, and that children should not be taught religious or moral values until they are mature adults. These teachings became immensely popular even though these theories were directly contrary to Scripture and credible studies; for example, studies reveal that over eighty percent of the personality is developed before a child is six years old, and all or most of the personality is developed before the teen years. (Consider Proverbs 22:6, 15; 29:15, 17; Isaiah 28:9) With the prosperity following WWII came the popular notion that parents must make sure their children never do without anything and children must have everything their parents did not have, and this became the priority for many.

·        Sex education is the job of secular government-run public schools because all sex is sin, sex is dirty, and Christians must never talk about it. (Sex is sacred and beautiful, which is the reason for standards of sexual morality, and the Bible is not prudish about sex. -Ruth 4:13; Proverbs 5:18-20; Song of Solomon 1:13; 5:4; 7:6-8; I Corinthians 7:2-5; Hebrews 13:4; etc... Incidentally, an old and simple method of teaching children about sex is to read the Bible to them every day; as they get older various passages will arouse questions and those questions will provide opportunities for proper instruction.)

·        The modern theory that teenagers can be kept from attracting or desiring the opposite sex though legislation, superstition, or social custom is a fantasy far removed from reality. The Bible does not pretend or imply that young women can be kept from attracting or desiring men but established safeguards and moral guidelines. (Consider Song of Solomon 8:8-9) Teen pregnancy is not a social malady, a dangerous trend, or a modern phenomenon; throughout history most women married in their teens and most mothers bore their first child while in their teens. It is ironic that some modern laws meant to stop sexual abuse give youths opportunities to be sexually immoral with reduced risk of disclosure or reprisal and thus make them more vulnerable; consider that statutory rape is the only felony in which an underage youth can willingly participate, and even initiate the crime, without reprisal. On the other hand, statutory rape laws and marriage laws that raise the age of consent and the age at which a teenager can marry (even with parental consent) do not keep an underage young woman from attracting or desiring the opposite sex, they simply discourage unmarried gentlemen with honourable motives from romantic interest for fear of social and legal repercussions. This, along with frequent misapplication of the word “pedophilia” (sexual attraction to, or sexual relations with, prepubescent children), also sends out the wrong message by implying that the sexual abuse of a prepubescent child is no worse or different than consensual sex with a teenager. In many cases there are practical reasons to delay marriage until older, and we should be concerned about protecting young people from abuse and exploitation, but a blanket condemnation or prohibition against teenage marriage has negative effects. (Back in 1990 I saw a news report about the alarming number of teenage pregnancies, and since my mother was a teenager when I was born but was married before she was pregnant the wording of the report got me to wondering why the media treats this as a social malady. I went to the library to research if this really is a growing problem and learned that in decades and centuries past there was a higher percentage of teenagers having babies but a much lower percentage of unwed pregnancies. Later I read in a magazine about a then recent study that revealed that in most unwed teenage pregnancies the illegitimate father is a married man, and this led to further research. I encourage the reader to research this yourself and see if you get the impression that the liberal media has been deliberately working to distort our perspective on this issue.)

·        A popular theory in Christian circles is that a church cannot be effective without programs. While some programs can be helpful, there is need for caution. All too often church programs replace united prayer, ministry, and patriarchy, and otherwise effectively program God out of a church, and this is largely how churches lost their impact on young lives. It is the prayer base that empowers a church, and it is the word of God that leads lost people to salvation and saved people to sanctification and service. United and prevailing prayer, and Bible preaching, teaching, and study is the great need of the hour. Neglect and indifference toward the Word of God among professed believers is deplorable. A good farmer or gardener prepares the soil to make it receptive to the seed he plants; likewise, doctrinal instruction is needed to lay a foundation for effective evangelism. All too often the salvation of souls is made the only object of ministry and witnessing while Bible doctrine is neglected, and then we wonder why fewer people respond to the Gospel. In many a conservative Bible-believing church there is as much immorality, among both young and old, as there is in any bar or nightclub while the church tries to convert the lost and edify believers with everything but the Word of God. (Psalm 119:130; I Timothy 4:13 & 16; II Timothy 2:15; 3:16; Hebrews 4:16)

·        A deceptive philosophy that has ruined many Christian youths is the philosophy that we must compete with the world to keep our youths, that we must offer them good, clean fun, recreation, and entertainment or we will lose them to the world. This philosophy loses both ways, as we can never expect to win competing against the world when it comes to fun and thrills. Think about it: The high of a hayride or a roller coaster ride cannot compare to the high they can get from recreational drugs, and the fun of rafting or roller skating cannot compare to the fleshly satisfaction they can get from fornication. Attempting to reach carnal people with carnal things can be dangerous and is not Biblical evangelism. It is inevitable that someone who supports trying to reach carnal people with carnal things will give the odd statistic of someone who was converted this way, but it is important to follow rules and not exceptions. All too often a youth ministry is ministry to youths and not ministry of youths, and all the preaching and teaching of "abstain," "thou shalt not," and "self-denial" is meaningless when children and youths are not taught to serve God, and to serve God by serving others, instead of expecting to be served. (Note that service marked the difference between the generations in Judges 2:10-13) While we should not condemn all secular amusements and fun, and it is not a sin to have recreation and fellowship, providing recreation and entertainment is not the church's mission and should not be the church's focus.

The list of examples could continue but these should suffice for now. 

When I was a teenager, it annoyed me to hear a teenager use their youth as an excuse for recklessness or rebellion, or to hear someone older use their youth as a cop out to excuse the sins of their youth by saying they were a teenager, as though every teenager does what they did or behaves as badly and that erases any guilt, and sometimes this still bothers me. When you were a teenager, you did not sin because you were a teenager, you sinned because you were a sinner, and if you were an extremely immature teenager it was because you were extremely immature. 

Please do not misunderstand what I am saying, I am certainly not arguing that all teenagers are mature, or that parental consent should not be required for important or major decisions and choices. (I am also in favour of raising the voting age. It is ironic when someone who says teenagers should not be trusted with firearms says teenagers should decide who to entrust with government power, as though government power is not dangerous.) But I do want to share some food for thought: When we penalize all teenagers because of what some teenagers do, did, or might do, who is being limited or restricted? Are we really limiting or restricting the extremely immature little brats in the bodies of teenagers who do not respect elders or authority, or are we penalizing the young ladies and young gentlemen who are not the problem? Also consider, how do you or would you respond to being penalized for the wrongdoing of others? (Besides, nobody 21 or older ever commits crimes or behaves irresponsibly. Right?) 

          If you are a teenager reading this, you should seriously consider whether you are a child or a young adult. Age does not necessarily mean maturity or immaturity. Since you are not physically a child it is natural for you to dislike being treated like a child and normal to desire to be accepted as a young adult and be trusted with adult responsibilities and privileges. But regardless of whether it is fair or unfair you are at an age where you must prove yourself to be accepted as a young adult. Consider this: If I were to describe someone who always demands his (or her) own way, constantly struggles to be the center of attention, never takes responsibility for his decisions and actions, must always be humored or pampered, and is disrespectful toward his elders, would you tend to assume that I was talking about a mature adult or a small child? Now consider this: As your elders observe your overall attitudes and behaviour, are they reminded of a mature adult or a small child? (Consider I Corinthians 13:11)

How well do you get along with adults (especially of your own gender) who are older and wiser than yourself? Do you have any good friends of your own gender who are over thirty? (If not, then, why not?) Fellowship and friendship with adults of your own gender who are older and wiser than yourself is needful, unless a state of suspended childhood is your goal, and you want your elders to keep thinking of you as a small child in a larger body; in that case all you need to do is limit your associations to immature people and avoid the influence and fellowship of adults who are older and wiser than yourself. (Proverbs 13:20)

Do you respect your elders? Respect for elders demonstrates character, and you will never be too old to respect your elders. For example, if, when you are a senior citizen, your pastor is decades younger than yourself you will be obliged to respect him as your elder. Disrespect for elders is not a sign of growth, manhood, or womanhood. (Deuteronomy 27:16)

“Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise;) That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” (Ephesians 6:2-3) You may not feel that your parents are honourable, but that is not the issue. If you were in a courtroom you would have to honour the judge and address him as “your honour,” and this says nothing about the judge as a person or whether you even like him but is merely recognising the authority of the judge’s position. Just as there are no perfect children, there are no perfect parents, and it is important to recognise that your parents are human like you while God requires you to honour them if for no other reason than God made them your parents. As a child grows the parental role of guardian and disciplinarian progressively decreases to be replaced by the role of counselor and mentor. What is your attitude toward your parents? What is your attitude toward their counsel? What is your attitude when you disagree with them or when they are wrong? Remember, the real test of respect is when you disagree, not when you agree. (Proverbs 1:8-9; 6:20-23; 9:8-9; 15:5, 20; 23:22)

This will have a definite impact on your life and relationships. (Ephesians 6:2-3) For example, if a young lad does not honour his parents how can he be expected to honour his wife when he marries, and if a young woman does not respect and obey her parents how can she be expected to respect her husband when she marries? (I Peter 3:7; Ephesians 5:33)

For some reason there is a common tendency to refuse to learn lessons from the past, as though we must be superior to our forefathers and cannot acknowledge that someone else may have possessed more wisdom in some area. I am not trying to romanticize the past or claim that any human society was ever without wrongs and imperfections. I am simply asking you to consider the obvious: If certain problems with youths that are now rampant, and are even considered normal or acceptable now, were at one time the exceptions and not the rule, it must be that our forefathers (though human like us) were doing something right and that those things which they were doing right were discontinued. 

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Food for thought:

 

Childish Labor Laws by Thomas Sowell

 

Abolish Adolescence!, By Thomas Sowell

 

Public Schools are Literal Prisons for Children, by T. J. Roberts

 

 Does the Bible say what is the proper age for marriage?

 

“Why We Have No Youth Ministry At Calvary Road Baptist Church”